Where You Can Find Me Page 6
I placed my palm in his and felt a fire move up my arm and down to my core. With a solid nod in answer, we made our way inside. We chose our selection from the chalkboard menu and grabbed a booth along the wall under the decorative loft. Looking at the table nearby with two girls giggling over their textbooks and their hair haphazardly piled on top of their heads in that perfect stylish way, I started to feel old. Their short denim shorts and crop tops made me feel drab in comparison.
Then I remembered the mistakes I made as a young and reckless student and I felt immensely better about being older, wiser and stronger. You couldn’t make me repeat those years for a million dollars.
Since we both had to get back to work soon, the conversation was simple, allowing us to get to know each other. Throughout the meal he gave me his full attention. He never made me feel weird, but actually laughed at my usually awkward comments. I warned him of my peculiar and sometimes inappropriate sense of humor. He just laughed and said he might find it a sexy.
Sexy? Sexy!
I couldn’t believe my luck that I had found a guy who thought my lame jokes were sexy. I would not look a gift horse in the mouth.
To top it off, all throughout our time together he found ways to touch me. A lingering caress to my hand, bumping his knees against mine. It all seemed simple, but the feelings those small grazes evoked in me were anything but juvenile. Trying to not fall at this man’s feet and beg him to take me to the bathroom again, became more and more difficult with each touch. I was surprised I didn’t have flushed cheeks from how hot the rest of my body was getting.
I thought my knees were going to give out when he placed his hand extra low on my back to walk me out of the restaurant. Standing on the sidewalk he kept his hand at my waist when I turned to look up at him.
“Luella, thank you for an amazing lunch. I know it wasn’t long but it was enjoyable.”
“For me, too. We’ll have to do it again.”
“Definitely. I’m not sure what my schedule is looking like right now, but I’ll call you and hopefully we can see each other this weekend?”
“Okay,” I breathed, nodding my head.
After a small pause to think about what to do next, Jack leaned down to kiss my cheek. I quickly turned my head and he caught the corner of my mouth, landing partially on my cheek, partly on my lips. In an instant I remembered how his lips felt on mine. How they felt on my skin—my nipple. I took a deep breath through my nose and stepped into him. He pulled his head back enough to look in my eyes. I peered through my lashes to see the heat in his. One side of his mouth quirked up in a smirk and he leaned into me again. Instead of kissing me he leaned toward my ear and whispered, “As much as I want to take you up on the promise your eyes are making me right now, this sidewalk isn’t quite as private as the bathroom. Otherwise I wouldn’t hesitate.” He lightly bit my ear and my breath caught in my lungs while I shoved my chest into his in reaction. “So for now I will let you go.” Jack pulled back and bent at the knees to make sure he could see my face. “But remember how you look at me next time. While I will always respect your wishes, sometimes I might push your boundaries.” And with a wink he stepped away turning to walk back to his car. “Until next time, my sweet Luella.”
I raised my hand for a small wave. My stunned body wasn’t capable of anything else. My breath released and I finally blinked my wide eyes as I clumsily turned to head back to my car, daydreaming of next time.
Chapter Nine
Howl - Florence and the Machine
The next two weeks flew by. November gave way to December and our Indian summer disappeared with it. Thanksgiving passed in a blur. It was never a big deal in our family after our parents passed away, but Jameson and I started our own tradition of spending Thanksgiving at a Japanese hibachi grill. The holidays made me miss Asher the most and I could see the sorrow on Jameson’s face. While we made the best of our quirky traditions, we missed the family we once had. Sometimes, like this year, Evie would join us when she didn’t have the time to travel home to California. She said she preferred our hassle-free tradition to the craziness of her family. I think she really just liked torturing Jameson. Evie naturally had a carefree, whimsical attitude toward life, but I thought she enhanced it for the sake of getting on his nerves. I preferred to lean back and enjoy the show.
Jameson fought his attraction to Evie and the more he fought the more frustrated he became. It never failed to amuse me when he got his panties in a bunch. Evie and I would always give each other knowing looks and laugh at my brother’s expense. I somehow managed to always be surprised by the shade of red his anger brought on. One day those two were going to collide. I felt both dread and excitement for that day.
Jack took some time to go see his family in Texas. I didn’t ask him to join my family since we had only been seeing each other for a few weeks and there was no need to rush it. We had spent the last two weeks much like the first one. We met up for lunch every once in awhile and tried to see each other on the weekends. Sometimes we texted all day. Silly messages sharing lame jokes—nothing important. Other days we didn’t speak at all, but I often woke to a message he’d sent in the middle of the night.
I knew he worked on the case which took more time than he wanted. He never talked about it and I never asked, but I could sense the tension that maybe things weren’t going as easily as he had hoped. Sometimes when we saw each other he had dark circles under his eyes and his hair looked like he had dragged his hands through it one too many times. He sounded tired and drained, whether it be emotionally or physically. However, despite whatever he may or may not have had going on, he always made me feel worth it. And that was what I needed in life in that moment. My past was just that—my past—but sometimes feelings linger and cling to you in minor ways. You never notice them because they’re small and insignificant, until they’re not anymore.
Whenever I looked at Jack, part of me was pulled toward my past and it weighed me down. When I looked at how beautiful he was, I questioned my worthiness. I wasn’t necessarily putting myself down, but I understood my average looks. I was fit from working out, but I had never been described as a knockout. My defining feature was most likely my eyes. They were large in a pretty way, and the bright green made them stand out against my darker hair. Other than that, I had accepted that I was average. After some struggles I learned to look on the brighter side of life. I knew beauty was in the eye of the beholder. I knew there were different strokes for different folks, and apparently my stroke was just right for Jack. I tried to let it be at that. I tried to let my insignificant hang-ups be just that: insignificant.
But sometimes the past had a way of butting its head in your business when all you were trying to do was let it go.
* * *
Jack: Let me take you to dinner tomorrow tonight. Nothing too fancy, but somewhere we can be together. Maybe dance a little.
This message came late Thursday night as I climbed into bed.
Me: Jack, I’m not having sex in a bathroom with you again just because you get me to dance.
Jack: Haha! Not what I was thinking. But I won’t lie, I wouldn’t be opposed.
Me: I bet. And am I not worth fancy?
Jack: Oh, baby. You are worth more than anything fancier I can give you. But I heard this place has good food and I thought I would try it with you. I still feel bad about canceling last weekend.
Jack and I had plans to see a movie and he had to cancel last minute because a meeting ran over. I tried to reassure him not to worry but obviously the man couldn’t listen.
Me: Don’t feel bad. I told you this already … don’t make me spank you. *raises eyebrow*
Jack: Oh Lu … Don’t play with fire.
Me: But I’m already hot—and you said you wanted to try new things with me. ;)
Jack: You have no idea the things I want to try with you Lu.
I stopped for a minute and considered my options. I knew my next response would be a turning point. I could have m
ade a joke and turned it back to a more friendly conversation or I could have responded the way I really wanted to. That past few weeks had been simple between us. We touched and kissed and sometimes the kisses got a little heated, but we always managed to pull back. We had to because we were usually out in public. But tonight, in the privacy of our homes, I could take this somewhere further. I paused staring at the screen contemplating my options.
Me: Tell me…
I had thrown the ball into his court. I wasn’t saying I wanted to go further, but I wasn’t denying that I wanted to.
Jack: … what??
Me: Tell. Me.
Jack: Lu, the things I want to try with you … I don’t even know where to start. I’ve been trying to take things slow, but every time I think about you I remember our night at the club. I remember how soft you are. How sweet you taste. The way you moan my name when you come.
My breathing sped up and I felt a flush invade my cheeks.
Me: Tell me more … please.
Jack: That reminds me of the way you begged me to let you come. I remember the way your breasts bounced when I fucked you. But what I remember most is the fire and desire in your eyes when we were being watched.
Jack: I remember when you told me you liked it.
Jack: That’s what I want to try … I want to find, and try, all the things that make that same fire and desire come back into your eyes. I want to try everything with you. Anything for you.
Me: Oh God.
Jack: Do me a favor Lu.
Me: Anything.
Jack: Make yourself come for me … send me a picture to prove it … I can’t call now, otherwise I could talk you through it baby, but prove it to me another way.
Shit. My body was on fire. One big throbbing blaze. It roared louder and louder with each message that came from him. I thought I would feel shame when he reminded me of how turned on I was when that guy walked in on us. But instead, what I remembered was the desire to be watched and wanted when it happened. Jack’s approval only ignited the burn hotter. I didn’t need his approval, but I wanted it.
With his words swimming in my mind I set about my task. With a tentative touch, I swiped my thumbs across my nipples. When they hardened I pinched them hard, gasping and lifting my hips in reaction. Lifting my tank to just above my tits, I used my left hand to continue playing with them and with my right hand I pushed into my underwear to feel my pussy. I was so wet from his words that I knew he wouldn’t have to wait long for proof.
With trembling knees, I dug my heels into the bed, my pointer and ring finger parting my lips to expose my clit. The cool air blew against me and I used my middle finger to rub my bud. I continued to play with my nipples remembering how Jack sucked on them, almost making me come from that alone. Pushing two fingers inside, I massaged while my vagina tightened, gaining friction. I pulled out and began to run my two fingers in tight circles around my clit and roughly pinched and pulled on my nipples.
A moan slipped from my throat wishing I could hear Jack’s voice whispering in my ear. All of a sudden his eyes flashed in my mind almost sending me over the edge. Clenching my eyes, focusing on the image, when from behind him my imagination conjured the guy who walked in on us. Jack smiled and made room for the stranger with gray-blue eyes. I gasped knowing what was coming next. Heat spread throughout my body as my heels dug deep into my mattress causing my ass to lift off the bed clenching tight as my pussy began pulsing through my orgasm. Slick fingers rubbed quickly trying to extend the pleasure as my pulse pounded through my body. I stopped breathing and tightened every muscle, making it last.
At last, I took a breath and relaxed back on the bed, slowing my fingers to bring me back down from my climax. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, smiling at how good it felt. Then I thought about how Jack asked me to prove it to him. I grabbed my phone thinking of taking a picture but not wanting to be so obvious. I pulled my fingers away from my clit and heard how wet they were.
So wet I could see my come.
I decided to be a little obvious and took my right hand and held my left breast, letting a little of my nipple peek through. I captured only half my face in the picture showing my glazed eye, the sweat along my hairline, and the pink flush still tainting my skin. Without thinking too much about it, I sent the picture.
I waited, but I didn’t have to wait for long.
Jack:…Fuck me Luella… I just… I’m fucking speechless. I would give just about anything to lick to those damn fingers clean.
Me: I’ll lick them clean for you.
Jack: *growls* Tomorrow night. We are going on a date tomorrow night. And Luella?
Me: Yes Jack?
Jack: The rules of have changed … the speed of this game has changed. Be ready.
Chapter Ten
Bones - Michael Kiwanuka
The next night I waited by the front window, watching for Jack. I didn’t want him to come to the door, afraid of what would happen if he did, afraid we would have stayed in the house and never made it on the date. I wasn’t sure why I decided to hold out so long on the no-sex and take it slow. But I had a strong feeling tonight would change that. I might have pushed Jack too far with our conversation last night. I might have pushed myself too far last night.
So when Jack pulled into my driveway at seven-thirty I quickly ran out to meet him. When I turned from locking my front door he was by his truck waiting for me. As I got closer, I could make out the smirk on his mouth and as I rounded his truck to the passenger side, he placed a hand on my lower back, guiding me. As though crossing some divide when we reached my door, he roughly pushed me back against the truck, his hands caging me in.
Shocked, I looked up and saw a fiery heat behind his blue eyes before his mouth came crashing down on mine. There was no slow start, building up to something more passionate, no restraint. Jack gave me the passionate frustration he had been feeling since last night all in that one kiss. He pushed his hands into my hair while he savagely opened my mouth with his tongue demanding entrance. I gave no resistance.
He swept me up in his storm of desire and I willingly went along. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him close to me. As the shock of his attack settled down I began to give as good as I got. I rubbed my tongue against his, dueling for dominance. I wanted to stoke his fire hotter and make him push for more. I was baiting an animal and I was fearless in my task. That almighty high of power surged through me and I wanted to know I had some control over his desire. I wanted to know I could evoke more from him with a moan from my lips.
So I did. I rubbed my breasts against him and moaned deep in my throat letting him know what he did to me. He answered my challenge by pushing his dick into my stomach pinning me harder against the truck. I took the moment to move side to side rubbing against him. With a deep growl coming from his chest he pulled my hands from his back and pinned them to the truck, pulling his lips away.
“Enough,” he said in his deep sexy voice. “God, woman. What the hell do you do to me?”
I shyly looked down at the ground with a Cheshire smile, only to peek up at him through my lashes seductively. At least I hoped it was. “I don’t do anything.”
“Bullshit you don’t.” He leaned down and gave me a soft peck on my lips. “It’s probably for the best you met me out here and not let me come to your door. We might not have left. Now get in before I change my mind and drag you to the nearest bed.”
As I climbed into his truck, he gave me a slap on the ass.
As he drove out of my subdivision, I asked, “So where are you taking me tonight, Jack?”
“It’s a place a buddy and I go for drinks. The atmosphere is nice and the food is great. They have a small dance floor and I have been eager to see you dance for me again.” He looked over with a wink.
“Hmm? What’s the name, maybe I have heard of it?”
“King’s.”
Oh.
Fuck.
Me.
The playful smile fell f
rom my lips. Thankfully Jack had his eyes on the road and couldn’t see the panic playing out on my face. Maybe there was another King’s? I swallowed trying to get my voice to come out as calm as possible. “Oh … Umm … Where is it? Is it far?”
“No, it’s close to the Mt. Adam’s area.”
My eyes widened and I tried to calm down. Of all the bars he could have taken me to he was taking me to my brother’s. Shit.
It was okay. It would be okay. Jameson usually worked in the back doing paperwork Friday nights. Maybe I would luck out. Maybe Jameson wouldn’t even notice I was there and wouldn’t pull his big brother act and embarrass me and ruin my night and make me hate him forever. Maybe … maybe.
I could hear the maniacal I-was-about-to-lose-my-shit laughter building in my head and hoped that it would stay there so I didn’t look like a raging lunatic in front of Jack. Then I wouldn’t have to worry about Jameson because I would ruin it all by myself.
Jack saved me from my inner crazy dialogue by asking if I was alright.
“Yeah! Of course! Why wouldn’t I be?” I might have sounded a little too jovial and I knew the smile on my face leaned closer to crazy than happy. But Jack seemed to be unconcerned.
“You just got a little quiet. I thought maybe you didn’t like King’s.”
I thought about the possibility of saying I hated the restaurant and making him take me somewhere else. But he seemed excited and I didn’t want to come off as an unappreciative bitch. So I hoped for the best. “No, I’ve been there a few times. It’s a great place,” I answered, sending up a prayer to whoever would listen that this didn’t end in disaster.