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  Surrender

  Fiona Cole

  Copyright © 2020 by Fiona Cole

  All rights reserved.

  Cover Designer: Indie Girl Promotions

  Interior Design: Indie Girl Promotions

  No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, actual events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Contents

  1. Jake

  2. Jackson

  3. Jake

  4. Jake

  5. Jackson

  6. Jake

  7. Jackson

  Epilogue

  About the Author

  Also by Fiona Cole

  To everyone who loved Jake and Jackson.

  Thank you.

  1

  Jake

  “Mom, this dinner is delicious, as always,” I complimented, the rich tomato sauce from the lasagna almost making me moan with each bite.

  “I totally agree, Joanne. Your cooking is always a treat.” Jackson took a bite and didn’t hold back his moan. It wasn’t meant to be sexual, but I couldn’t hear that sound and not immediately think of all the ways I could make him do it again. “It’s a shame you didn’t pass your cooking skills on to Jake.”

  “Ha. Ha,” I mocked.

  He looked across the table and winked before taking another bite, making sure I was watching when he slicked his tongue across his lips. He was playing with fire and knew it. I couldn’t wait to get him home and force him to his knees before filling his mouth, making him moan around my cock. And I knew he’d return the favor, making me love every second.

  This man was my best friend—my fiancé. I looked at him and my heart tripped over itself, beating harder with all the love I had. Who knew how much things could change in a year? My lips tipped up slightly when I thought of all the changes he brought to my life.

  Hell, this time last year, I was engaged to Carina. So sure of my future. So sure of who I was as a man—a straight man.

  Until I saw Jackson again.

  He’d flipped my world upside down without even trying, making me realize that was the way I was supposed to be the whole time. I loved him more than I thought possible and he held my hand through every step I fought to accepting myself.

  “I told you, Jackson, call me Mom,” my mom admonished.

  “Yes, Mom.”

  “And where is that brother of yours?” she asked with a raised brow.

  “He’s on a date tonight. He was bummed to miss your food. I was sure he was about to cancel his date, but well…he’s Andrew.”

  “Yes, ever since he began walking again, he’s been very…active.”

  That was a polite way of putting it. Andrew had done a lot of physical therapy over the past year and got some mobility back in his legs, allowing him to use arm braces to walk. He said it was just enough of an injury to bring the ladies in.

  “Yeah. Active,” Jackson said dryly.

  “Well, I’ll be sure to send you home with some leftovers for him.”

  “Thank you, Joa—Mom.”

  We finished the rest of dinner with small talk about how our week had been. It was all normal and perfect.

  But it was hard to focus on the conversation with Jackson constantly making innuendos and eye-fucking me across the table. The way he ate the breadstick almost had me demanding he follow me to the bathroom right fucking now.

  My mom was oblivious as she sipped her wine and laughed at Jackson’s stories about the bar he co-owned.

  “I can’t eat another bite.” Jackson rubbed a hand down his firm chest and leaned back before patting his washboard stomach. He rubbed his hand back up his chest and held my stare with heated eyes. I wanted to jump up from the table and leave now, but I needed a moment to get my cock under control before I scarred my mom with the boner trying to burst through my zipper to get to Jackson.

  I opened my mouth to make an excuse to get out of here, but my mom beat me to the punch.

  “Now, time for dessert,” she exclaimed, clapping her hands.

  “Mom, I’d love to but—”

  “I won’t have it. I picked up some stuff especially for you,” she said before walking through the doorway to the kitchen.

  “Eager to get home, baby?” Jackson asked, a sly smirk on his full lips.

  “Not really. Why?” I aimed for indifference, but the way I had to swallow the saliva building in my mouth gave away how close I was to drooling over him.

  “I figured you’d be eager to get home so I can bend you over the couch and fuck that tight ass of yours.”

  I scoffed. I loved this game with him. “You can try. I’ll have you pinned to the wall within two seconds of stepping through the door.”

  “That’s fine. Perfect position for me to shove you to your knees and make you take my cock.”

  I couldn’t help it, I groaned. My hand drifted between my legs and squeezed my throbbing length. Jackson watched the movement and it was his turn to swallow.

  “God, I can’t wait to be inside you,” I said breathlessly. “Any way I can. Your ass or mouth. I just need you.”

  His fists clenched on the tabletop and I think we were both about to jump up and leave without saying goodbye. Hell, we’d probably have to stop halfway home just to relieve the intense ache.

  “So, I happened to be at a bakery,” my mom cut through the thick tension burning between us.

  I took a handful of deep breaths before I could look up. She set a tray on the table, holding small rectangles of cake, all of them different.

  “What is that?” I asked.

  “Well, I went in for some cannolis, but we got to talking and I told her you were planning a wedding, and one thing led to another, and she sent me home with these.”

  It came out in a rush and I barely held back my sigh. Jackson and I had been engaged for a while now, but we hadn’t done much wedding planning. Not that it stopped my mom. She was so eager to have “the most beautiful wedding ever” that she constantly looked into things. I couldn’t blame her. She planned events all the time for charities and fundraisers, so planning parties was in her blood. Planning her son’s wedding was the pinnacle, as she explained it.

  I looked over to Jackson and the heat from his eyes dimmed. I caught his stare and he smiled, but it looked strained. Jackson tended to be close-mouthed about the wedding, and it bothered me, but I wasn’t too concerned. Jackson and I loved each other and if big weddings didn’t excite him, then that was fine. As long as I could call him my husband, that was all that mattered.

  “Thank you, Mom. These look delicious.”

  She sighed in relief. “Oh, good. I know I’m supposed to wait for you boys, but I couldn’t help myself. And what’s the harm in a little extra cake?”

  She sat down and began explaining all the flavors. There were about nine different cake combinations, all with different fillings and icing and they began to blur halfway through.

  “She said you can call and schedule a better tasting. She sets up a whole display so you can create your own combinations. She’s really amazing—one of the top bakers in the area. She was even on one of those baking competitions and won.”

  “She sounds expensive,” Jackson muttered.

  “Nonsense,” my mom waved his comment away. “There’s no such thing when it comes to planning your wedding. Speaking of, do we have a date yet?”

/>   I looked over at Jackson, but he was staring down at his plate, mashing his fork into the leftover cake. I knew he was just as frustrated as I was about not having a date set. The only difference was that he was the one putting it off.

  “Daniel hasn’t been able to give dates that Jackson can take off yet. He’s opening that new place in New York and will need Jackson to cover while he’s away. So we’re trying to plan around that.”

  “Well, that’s awfully selfish.”

  “Mom.”

  “It’s my son’s wedding,” she defended. “A mother wants to plan these things.”

  I laid my hand over hers. “I know and we appreciate it. We’ll let you know as soon as we do.”

  She gave a small smile, turning her hand under mine and giving it a squeeze. “Thank you.”

  I looked to Jackson to find him watching our hands with something akin to guilt in his eyes, but I was sure I was reading him wrong. It was probably just nausea from all the cake we ate. “You ready to go?” I asked him.

  He blinked out of his stare and met my gaze, nothing but love shining there. Maybe I’d imagined it all. “Yeah,” he answered, standing to collect his plate.

  “None of that,” my mom stopped him. “I’ve kept you boys long enough. Head home and get some sleep. I’ve got clean up.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Of course.”

  “Okay. I’ve got that meeting tomorrow, so I appreciate being let off the hook,” I said.

  “Make sure you tell Carina I said hello.”

  “I will.”

  Even though Carina and I ended our engagement—in a brutal way—we still remained friends. She’d been my closest friend for most of my life. So, while it took her a while to not—rightfully—hate me, she did become my friend again. We’d never be as close as we once were, but she was extraordinarily important in both Jackson’s and my lives. Hell, if it wasn’t for her, I’d never have ended up with Jackson.

  Mom walked us to the door, making sure we took the extra cake home, and stood on the stoop as we went to the car.

  “Thanks again for dinner, Mom,” Jackson said.

  “Make sure you let me know which flavor is your favorite, okay?”

  We both nodded and closed the doors. We hadn’t even made it to the end of the long driveway before Jackson’s hand was between my legs. “I want to know which flavor is your favorite when you eat it off my dick.”

  I pressed on the gas and broke a few traffic laws to get home to find out.

  2

  Jackson

  I covered the yawn threatening to unhinge my jaw before lifting the coffee to my lips.

  Standing outside the Netherland Plaza, scanning the crowd for Jake, I wondered when the last time was that I hadn’t yawned constantly. At least a month ago. Maybe two?

  I’d been picking up extra shifts at Voy and Voyeur trying to save every penny. Between Andrew’s physical therapy, his new medical equipment, and this wedding that grew larger by the second, I wasn’t sure there were enough hours in the day to work to cover it all.

  I was one flower bouquet away from starting to perform again at Voyeur just to make more money. Not that I would ever do that to Jake, but dammit, I was struggling to keep up. A year ago, he was set to get married to a successful woman who could’ve paid for her wedding ten times over, and now there was me—poor, struggling me.

  Of course, I didn’t mention it, because he’d call me crazy and say what was his was mine. He’d wave it off and say that if his mom was the reason the wedding got so big, then let her pay for it. But she wasn’t my mom—not really. Mine had died years ago and hadn’t left me with much. I didn’t have a family member promising to pay half the wedding as they sent me off into holy matrimony.

  Who came up with that shit anyway?

  But mainly, I didn’t mention it, because he always looked so happy when his mom talked wedding planning. He didn’t care, but he loved giving his mother something to focus on and that made me happy. Happy wife, happy life.

  A chuckle slipped past my lips when I imagined Jake’s reaction if I called him my wife.

  Never in my life did I imagine being here: engaged and planning a wedding to a man. I’d almost always known I was bisexual, but I never thought I’d find someone to be enough for me to settle down.

  Until him.

  I saw his face through the window of the hired car, but had the wind knocked out of me when he stepped out and gave me that perfect smile. I fought the urge to run to him and pull him in for a kiss right there on the busy street. I craved to feel the rough brush of his scruff against my mouth as he aggressively feasted from my lips.

  His mom stepped up behind him and before I could greet her, he leaned in to press a quick peck to my lips. “Hey.”

  I swallowed at his nearness, trying to bring moisture back to my mouth. “Hey.”

  His rough fingers of one hand slipped between mine and the other moved to wrap around the hand holding the cup, forcing me to bring it to his lips. He didn’t break eye contact as he took a sip and I wondered how the hell watching his lips wrap around the lid of my cup could make my dick jerk in my pants.

  “Hello, Jackson,” Joanne greeted, squashing any erection.

  “Hello, Joa—Mom.” I was still getting used to calling her Mom. She loved me like a mom, and I cared for her deeply, so I had no issue with it. But I’d known her since Jake and I were in college and she’d always been Mrs. Wellington or Joanne.

  She tugged me down so she could place a chaste kiss to my cheek. “I love hearing that.”

  “Anything to make you happy.”

  She gave me a loving smile, like any mom would. “Let’s head inside. We’re meeting Andre Dorne for a tour.”

  I’d only been inside the Netherland Plaza once when my parents attended a fundraiser and brought me along. I’d looked up in awe at all the dark woods, golds, and intricate designs. It’d been huge and overwhelming to twelve-year-old me. It was still overwhelming to me. Now, I looked at each antique design and all I saw was dollar signs. This place was expensive—not in a subtle way, but in a way that screamed.

  Joanne greeted a thin man in a dark suit who held his nose in the air but also gave a genuine smile and firm handshake. The next hour passed in a blur of various rooms and the history behind each one that made it so unique and a top selection among couples. Joanne oohed and ahhed over it all. The bigger it was, the more excitement crept into her face.

  Jake nodded and paid attention, keeping my hand clasped in his until I pulled away with the excuse to use the restroom. In reality, I needed to escape before he felt how sweaty each option made my hands. I splashed water on my face and took a few deep breaths. I looked as tired as I felt. The dark circles under my eyes made the brown even darker.

  Shaking my head, I covered another yawn and left the safety of the restroom. Jake’s laugh reached across the space and squeezed my heart, forcing it to beat harder and faster. It always did. I loved him. I loved him with every single cell in my body. Seeing his head thrown back with joy surrounded by the golds that matched his hair reminded me of that love. My own lips tipped in a smile and I knew then, I’d get married anywhere he wanted. I’d work triple shifts if it meant keeping him as happy as he looked now.

  When I rejoined the group, Andre flipped open the binder he’d been carrying. “So, do we have a date in mind?”

  All three sets of eyes turned to me and I stuttered over my tongue, tripping on words like I’d never heard of a calendar in my life. “Ummm…I—um…what month is it now?”

  Joanne’s hand slapped my chest playfully. “You’re so funny, Jackson.”

  Breathing a laugh, I played it off, but couldn’t ignore the way Jake’s eyes narrowed at my reaction.

  “We don’t have a date set yet,” he answered easily for me.

  “Hmmm.” Andre pulled down his glasses to the end of his nose and dragged his finger down the page. “We had a cancellation for five months from now in November.
Just before Thanksgiving.” He looked up and smiled like he was giving us the winning numbers for the lottery.

  Joanne clapped her hands with excitement while I ran mine through my hair, scrambling for the right words.

  “Oh, umm. So soon.” I looked to Jake, who still had the questioning look on his face. “I’ll have to talk to work.”

  “Make sure you do it soon because a cancellation will be taken quick. Usually, I’d go to our waiting list, but I love you both so much, I just need you to get married here.” He was a little over the top, but the way Joanne agreed to every single extra package, I was sure he wanted that commission more than he actually cared about our marriage.

  “Thank you so much, Andre,” Joanne said. “We will definitely get back to you ASAP.”

  We all shook hands and made our exit. The hot, humid air of Cincinnati in June flooded my lungs, feeling better than the choking panic of that hotel.

  “I’ll leave you boys to talk. I’m going to go and have drinks with a friend. Make sure you keep me up to date on what you decide.”

  We’d made it about two steps away from the door when Jake finally asked the question I’d been dreading. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing’s wrong,” I answered, my shoulders slouched, my eyes glued to the pavement.

  “C’mon, Jackson. Don’t give me that bullshit answer.”

  “I just don’t understand what the rush is.”

  “There’s not a rush.”

  “Yet, here we are, and I can’t even get a day off right now, and you want me to tell you when I can get a whole week off six months from now.” The words found a crack in the stronghold I had them under and started flooding out. “I’m so damn busy. And you’re going to be busy with Carina’s maternity leave coming up. What do you want to do? Say fuck it and let everyone deal with the fallout?”